Yesterday was a hard one for me. A good
friend, Bella, who is the wife of the young man, Matthew, who lived with
us for a few years, took me to pick up Felix's ashes. It was about a 45
minute drive to get there but we found it thanks to her GPS on her cel
phone.
They
gave me Felix's wedding ring and a lock of his hair as I had requested.
They also gave me a big tote bag with their logo on it to carry his
ashes in a plain black plastic box that sort of looks like leatherette.
It was very heavy! It weighs more than a gallon of milk.
Now
I am wearing a gold chain necklace with his ring on it around my neck.
It's nice to reach down and touch it. This was a sterling silver simple
band that I had made for him when I took silver smithing classes in
college, so it's very special.
Later,
I took myself to my town hall and paid our property taxes, so now we are current with the town. While I was there, I had
them make 6 official copies of his death certificate for $65. I hope
that will be enough to cover all the bases. They charge extra if you get
them one at a time so this was best.
When
I got home, I read and re-read the death certificate and looked at the
container of his ashes. I shed a few tears and then felt better. It is
all so strange.
It
was a very warm sunny day in the mid 80's but with low humidity so not
too bad. The police just stopped in to check on my well-being and were
glad to know that I'm fine. I've been added to their list of daily check-ins so I need to call them everyday to let them know that I'm fine.
Now that I have his death certificate, I'm planning on going in to the Concord Social Security office early next week to do the official informing them of his death. As I understand it, they will cut one of our checks of income and I get to pick whichever is the larger one, which would be his. I hope that I can go early in the morning because it's supposed to be in the 90's and humid.
Thank you for listening to all my tales of trying to function as a widow.
Stay cool and happy quilting!
8 comments:
What a bonus to have his ring around your neck at all times to comfort you. I'm glad things are moving forward. Each new step will bring peace.
It seems like it must be a double sorrow to suddenly be alone while grieving your husband and having to take care of so many details, Vic. I think it's good you're wearing his wedding ring to keep him always close in thought. Blessings to you during this hard time.
I am glad Bella was with you during that experience of bringing Felix home. Wearing that special ring you had made for him is a great way to feel him with you.
I appreciate the fact that the police are keeping your welfare as a part of their daily routine.
If my memory from my father's passing is correct, your six copies should be adequate. Always so many details to take care of.
Continuing to keep you in my daily prayers.
It is so difficult to have to take care of all these things when you are in the midst of grieving...am sending my best thoughts out to you...hugs, Julierose
Thank you for your courage or bravery or ??? to keep us informed of how your days are turning. We gals will all need to know what to do, how to say it, etc. Felix IS proud of you for keeping your life all in order like he would have wanted. Elaine Adair
I'm so glad you had someone to take you to pick up Felix. I can't imagine how hard it is for you. It is a comfort to know that the police department is looking out for you. Hugs.
having friends and family support during these times gives us all courage to persevere...
Enfolding Hugs.
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